Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Infertility Made Me a Better Mother

 Kal & me, playing on my laptop

I can honestly say that infertility and adoption have made me a better mother. And when I say this... I don't mean a better mother than other mothers. I'm not comparing myself to others at all, and none of us should! What I mean is that I'm a better mother than I would have been had I not experienced infertility and adoption.

I've learned to be more patient, humble, less self-centered and greedy, a better sharer, more loving, charitable, empathetic, and kind. I am a more grateful and attentive mother. I appreciate my blessings more. I'm a better listener. I know now that I can do hard things - that I can rely on God through anything and He'll always be there to guide me if I allow Him to lead me. I know now how important children and family are to me - my priorities have completely changed. I learned that I need to work hard to strengthen family bonds and hold dearly to my loved ones, to love them fiercely, and be ready to fight for them. I know what I and my husband are capable of as partners.

Of course, I'm not perfect in any of these virtues... but I know that both infertility and adoption helped me develop qualities that don't necessarily come naturally to me and probably would've taken a lot longer to develop to the point that they have had I not been infertile and had to overcome that trial in my life.

I am more confident in who I am. I know who I want to be and what I want to stand for as a woman, as a mother, as a member of my Church, and as a passionate advocate for adoption as an option for crisis pregnancies and for a pro-life stance on abortion.

I had a crash course in what my weaknesses are and where my breaking points are. This was a trial I was meant to go through. An obstacle to overcome. My own personal life circumstance that was created for me, because God knows me. And He knows how to make me better. And He knows what I can do, and how much I can grow, and what I can handle, and what would best teach me what He wants me to learn.

For me, infertility has been a blessing. And I'm glad I can see it that way now. :)

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