Those 10 weeks of waiting went mighty quickly!!! Lol. Only 2 weeks in and it's already over.
Miss H decided that she is going to parent Baby Girl. For reasons that I won't explain here. But let me just say that some people's lives are much, much, much more complicated than I could even imagine. And I'm not a sheltered individual. And I worry what Baby Girl's future will be, but Miss H seems dang determined to do whatever it takes and sacrifice whatever has to be sacrificed in order to be there for her daughter in the way that she thinks is best for her.
I totally get it. If I were in her shoes, I'd do the same. But I did hope she'd choose differently.
So here we are. Our own futures wide open. A blank slate of... well, what do we want to do now?
Part of me feels defeated, disillusioned, exhausted, and frustrated. As if people are telling us No just to mess with us.
Part of me feels relieved, untethered to a heavy weight that was on my heart, free from this domestic infant adoption drama I've been living in for way too long. I've been a drama-avoider most of my life. So to invite this kind of craziness in my life on purpose has just been insane. And anxiety-inducing. And stressful beyond measure.
But it's over.
Of Regrets and Resolutions
12 hours ago