Sunday, August 10, 2014

157 Draft Posts

Sooooo.... sometimes I start a post and never finish it. I'm reminded of this when I glance over in blogger and see that I literally have 157 draft posts. I guess I just never fully know what the heck I'm doing with my blog.

I never wanted to be a "mommy blogger" but I kinda do that sometimes to keep my family and Zay's family and Kal's birth family updated on things easily. I used to be an "adoption blogger," but my excitement for that has been waning as I've learned more about adoption as a business rather than a humanitarian effort. Ugh. Plus it's hard to talk about details when I want to protect other people's privacy. I'm also an "infertility blogger," but I'm not actively pursing any treatments that are fun to talk about, like IUI or IVF. I'm just making slow hormonal changes over time in the hopes that I can get my body to ovulate regularly and on its own (well, without ovulation-inducing drugs, I guess). That may or may not work.

I don't know what the heck I am writing about and I can't always finish a thought. I'm just writing. For free. Cuz I can. I like to write, but I can just as easily fill up my journals and abandon the blogging. I think I'm waiting for my happy ending, a way to wrap up our story of trying to add to our family. But I don't think I can keep up telling the story when I have no idea when that ending might be. And while it still feels like someone's missing, I just can't wrap it up and say "happily ever after." .... So I keep droning on and on.

Do I have any lurkers out there who want to ask me a question? Or... what would my readers like to hear about more often? What's going on out there on the Internet??? Anyone blog and wanna link up in the comments? Anyone reading any great blogs you wanna share? Anything exciting happening?

Talk to me, folks. Or else I'll just keep on rambling. :) This infertility/adoption madness sometimes just doesn't feel like it has a point to it.

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